INSIGHT: Should you accept an “inexpensive” engagement ring?
The terms ‘inexpensive’ or ‘cheap’ are subjective, meaning their interpretation varies from person to person. When someone mentions receiving an ‘inexpensive ring’ for an engagement, their feelings towards it may be influenced by personal preferences.
Consequently, my response to whether it is acceptable always hinges on individual preferences.
So, should you accept an “inexpensive” engagement ring?
This question has been a widely discussed topic for a week, and I’ve come across various perspectives on the matter. Moreover, considering both sides can shape your preference when faced with a similar experience.
As someone providing an additional perspective on this matter, I cannot dictate what you should or should not do. Instead, my role is to offer a bit of insight on both sides of the issue.
Furthermore, considering they’ve been together for eight years, the woman expressed some disappointment after receiving her 299-peso ring in 2023.
I understand that some individuals perceive the ring as a symbol of one’s financial capability when starting a family.
If a person struggles to afford a subjectively deemed suitable engagement or wedding ring, there might be concerns about their capability to navigate the challenges of sustaining a family. Moreover, this endeavor demands financial stability as well as physical and mental capability.
In this scenario, it suggests that the person proposing may not be currently prepared for marriage. Additionally, marriage entails significant expenses, including fees for the officiant, attire for the bride and groom, food for guests, and more (may it be a private or public wedding).
Returning to the individual’s post, it’s worth noting that they have been together for eight years.
During this time, she should have gained insight into her significant other’s spending habits and his capacity to provide. However, perhaps that’s why she had high expectations from her boyfriend.
The post only presents the woman’s perspective, leaving us unaware of the man’s situation and responsibilities. It’s important to acknowledge that having standards is acceptable, and she should not be criticized for having them. In the same way, we should also be appreciative of our partner’s efforts.
Moreover, consider the possibility that the man may have additional responsibilities within his family, limiting his ability to purchase a more expensive ring. In this case, it’s also valid to acknowledge that he still desired to propose. And despite financial constraints, he went ahead with the commitment of asking the woman’s hand for marriage.
Nevertheless, if the guy has prior obligations within his family and is not yet prepared to establish his own, then he should have reconsidered.
Marriage is a commitment that both individuals should embrace when they are emotionally, mentally, physically, and financially prepared, given its lifelong nature.
In reality, both individuals ideally should have the financial capacity when proceeding with a proposal and marriage.
The financial demands don’t cease after the proposal, and it even continues to persist throughout the marriage. After those two, it marks the beginning of even more financial responsibilities as husband and wife.
After marriage, choosing to have children introduces an additional obligation for both parties, including added financial expenses. It’s crucial to recognize that parenthood constitutes yet another lifelong commitment.
Hence, it’s essential to recognize that these three aspects—proposal, marriage, and parenthood—should not be taken lightly.
However, it’s noteworthy that there are instances of successful marriages that started from a more ‘affordable’ engagement ring.
A Filipina YouTuber and influencer based in Canada, Grace Delos Santos of Aj’s and Me, once expressed her perspective on this matter, sharing how their successful marriage began with an affordable ring. Furthermore, she emphasized that communication will always be the key. Therefore, over those years, the person should have understood her partner’s spending habits to effectively manage her expectations.
Indeed, this topic is debatable as some believe that a person shouldn’t fixate the relationship or one’s self-worth on the price tag of an engagement ring. This perspective holds truth, as love, being the foundation of any relationship, should transcend any monetary measure.
This is true if you see your partner working hard to improve themselves and make their life better. If you can also see when they refuse to settle for a modest life when a more prosperous one is within reach, then you can consider agreeing to his proposal. Because a person wanting to have a good living standard could keep a family and marriage.
Ultimately, what matters most in marriage are love, understanding, the character of the person, how both of you handle and communicate through challenges, and the underlying friendship within the relationship and marriage.
There is nothing wrong with settling for an affordable ring, just as it is perfectly okay to have higher expectations and standards to ensure long-term satisfaction for both parties. Additionally, effective communication can help navigate and understand each other’s expectations, fostering a deeper connection in the relationship.
