When Does a Discussion Become Unhealthy

Filipinos are known to be conversational. We want to have input on different topics and compare our points of view with others. There is no wrong with that. Making conversation is actually a nice gesture.

However, a discussion may turn sideways sometimes. Especially when the topic is either about politics, beliefs, or social issues. It becomes heated debates that may or may not be healthy for both parties. This kind of argument-sharing has no point to proceed. It will only offend, cause misunderstanding, and even end relationships.

So how do we know when a discussion is becoming unhealthy? Watch out for these circumstances.

When it is Becoming Personal

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Sure, discussions about a certain topic may branch out to more subject matters. This is normal and interesting conversations are those that progress to another topic. Although, when arguments turn into personal attacks, they should no longer continue.

Personal attacks may vary from petty to serious matters. This can be noticed when points thrown at each other are getting more specific than general. It can also happen when claims are becoming contextual based on the background of either group.

When Parties are not Listening

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People like talking and being heard. It is extremely vital for a discussion that each other is not only speaking but also listening. Listening entails analysis and critical thinking. Without both, it is close to hearing blah blah blah and nothing more. The main problem in a debate is when people are not listening but merely waiting for their turn to speak. That is when a conversation starts to get immature and be a waste of time.

Furthermore, there is no growth when people are not listening. To listen is to learn something new. Without it, there is no knowledge and without knowledge is complete ignorance and arrogance. We must open our ears as much as we open our mouths.

When There is no Resolution

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Resolution in a discussion is not necessarily a need but to have one is the goal. Ideally, it means that the parties involved are agreeing. Realistically, disagreement may not be a resolution but it is an outcome and it is important to have one. No discussion is without an outcome or it will not end.

The willingness to be in a discussion means you want to be open to possibilities that your perspective could change. Conclusions of discourse may satisfy or disturb your current point of view. That is when you know that a discussion is meaningful and healthy.

We all have different beliefs and principles. But, engaging in a discussion means being open to the beliefs of other parties. If you think your arguments are unbendable and absolute, you are in no form worthy of having a conversation with anyone.

Remember, open your mouth, open your ears, and open your mind.