It’s not a bad thing to be selfish in your 20s… or is it?
I’ve always believed that my 20s are supposed to be my selfish years. And, as a 25-year-old who hasn’t lived her life to its fullest, I want to know more about myself and do for myself. Am I where I think I should be? Where am I even going? Where do I want to go? And, what I am even doing with my life?
I can no longer say that I’m a 20-something, I don’t need to have anything figured out. But, I just have to. I need to take my future seriously and focus on myself. Although I want to do whatever I want, there’s a part of me that hopes to get out of my current state.
I want to be selfish; I want to travel, explore, do stupid shit, make mistakes, and learn from them. However, if I do, they would call me egotistic and not take my future seriously. But, the thing is — I do. I am taking my future seriously by doing the things I want to do and having those experiences as the basis of my fate.
I just want to be selfish and finally live my life. But, why do people make it seem like a bad thing?
I’ve lived how they told me to. I ended up going on autopilot doing what they expected me to. But, how will I know where I stand and what I want if I don’t break out of that? I have to be selfish in order to live my life. I want to embrace selfishness and operate in a place that stimulates growth and my personal development.
I don’t want to settle. I want to know myself better and learn what makes me happy, sad, excited, terrified, and so much more. It’s time for me to chase and go after it. I won’t learn those things if I don’t take the time to be selfish and explore other opportunities and my own heart.
It’s okay to be selfish; to put yourself first, and go after what you want even if others don’t understand.
Over the past few years, I’ve done a lot of things that made me feel better about… well, myself. And, I learned that it’s okay to put yourself first and it’s not something you need to feel guilty about. My mental well-being before others is something that I find hard to do. But, living my life to please other people had a major impact on my mental health. Although it’s nice to be considerate of other people, I need to find the balance of looking after myself, too.
I’m 25 now and I don’t want to go into the next chapter of my life with dread thinking about all the things that I haven’t done. I am currently scared to go into my 30s because I think I haven’t even lived. And, I don’t want to feel like that anymore. Instead, I want to enter it already knowing what I want while also being able to look back on memories that I could cherish.
I just want to be selfish.
