Friendship Lessons I Learned in My Early 20s
Threading through the early stages of adulthood is a tricky business to handle. Transitioning from teenage life to adulthood heightens the level of struggle up a notch. We, young adults, face several monumental changes in our lives. We get to experience changes in perspectives, ambitions, and life directions. Moreover, we begin learning more about the realities of life, relationships, and the nature of friendships. In a way, we start becoming wiser in dealing with our life dilemmas.
From my personal experiences being a young adult, I began learning quite a good number of truths, especially about friendship. These truths I did not fully understand when I was younger, not until I had my own experiences later in life.
With that, let me share with you a few friendship lessons I learned in my early 20s:
You Don’t Have to Talk Everyday
As we grow older, we become caught up with all sorts of engagements and responsibilities in our lives. We become more absorbed in school or work or business or whathaveyou, and sometimes 24 hours per day isn’t enough. We oftentimes even forget to care for ourselves because of our heavy loads. With that, more often than not, our chitchat time with our friends becomes a little less frequent than usual. But, don’t worry, that’s not a sign you’re getting into a friendship fallout. Oftentimes, that’s just a sign of your transitioning into adulthood.
Knowing Each Other’s Boundaries
Everybody has their own boundaries. And as close confidants to our friends, and them to us in reverse, we are expected to communicate and know each other’s limits. By knowing when and where to draw the lines, we become more sensitive to each other’s feelings and emotional needs. Even more, we can establish healthier relationships with our friends that are grounded in maturity and good communication.
It Takes Effort
According to the finest words of Theodore Roosevelt, “nothing worth having was ever achieved without effort.“ This holds especially true when talking about friendships. Like all other relationships, sustaining friendships also means giving them ample time, effort, and a good tinge of TLC (tender loving care). Although it is not regularly expected of us, reaching out and occasionally checking on some friends helps maintain this strong bond. So if you have the time, shoot your friends a chat or maybe ring them up. Do whatever suits your taste and you’re personal language.
Friendship Fallouts Happen, and It’s Okay
Though painful it may seem, friendship fallouts are an unfortunate part of growing up. Some friends you used to have big dreams with eventually become mere strangers to you as you grow older. It is an inevitable casualty of our journey to self-discovery and in our search for our own identities. However, if this happens to you, do not fret. It might be tough to go through, but it’s normal. Even more, it’s eventually going to be okay.
Separating Friendship From Work
Since most friendships spur from school or work, working on projects with an old pal is apparently inevitable. And sometimes, tensions unavoidably rise in the workplace due to the amount of pressure and work that we carry. Because of this, some friendships grow rifts at work, which, in turn, gets carried into their personal lives. This eventually becomes a point of argument between friends and sometimes, even causes friends to be no more. So, if there’s one thing I learned about friendships, that is to keep work from friendship apart.
Maintaining friendships in your early 20s is both fun and messy altogether. But from my experiences with my friends, there’s more to it than just the fun and mess in our relationship. There are these life-long lessons that come out from the entirety of the experience. These are the lessons that are worthy of keeping in the long run.
Have you had the same friendship experiences in your early 20s as well? Or perhaps going through the same experiences at the present? Share with us your thoughts!
