You’re single (if not, just imagine). Usually, you don’t like not having a partner. But sometimes, it’s not like you don’t prefer to be dating right now. I’m sure that you have heard these “why aren’t you dating anyone yet” statements:
“Ba’t single ka pa?”
“Ba’t wala ka pang boyfriend/girlfriend?”
“Maghanap ka na!”
“Kahit sino na lang. Malapit na pasko/Valentine’s!”
These statements are often heard among teenagers, and adults, lately. These days, being in a relationship (even at a young age) is normal and being otherwise is absolutely not. In this modern generation where everything is easy to acquire with one smartphone or computer click, finding love or a partner to love has become easier as well.
The rise of dating apps
Online dating, now commonly done through apps, has walked its way to becoming a cultural norm. It’s like every teenager, and adult can probably name an app or two. What’s special about it is it gives you hundreds of thousands of profiles to choose from. Plus, the way it is so accessible and easy to use is what makes it popular—almost like a tradition. Undeniably, in the technology-centered world we live in today, everyone would prefer the modern way. It is easier to choose their dates after three smartphone clicks or swipes instead of having to meet various people physically after being chatmates for a while.
Now, people’s demand for better apps and/or interfaces (plus the stubborn desire to get a partner) has increased. Accordingly, dating sites and apps have also improved themselves. Competitors even made their own apps to compete in the dating game. The more these developers make these apps, the more options these searchers get. Therefore, people tend to stress more amidst the confusion and rush they feel. As the result, the relationship often fails and results in another round of searching through the many options again.
How wide the use of these apps is and the effects on developers
According to CNN Philippines, a 2017 survey by analytics firm YouGov showed that half of Filipinos have used the internet and online dating apps. This number even rose to 56 percent among millennials. Even I know a lot of dating app users. Fortunately, most of their relationship is still going strong despite having to meet through a dating site.
There are a lot of dating sites and app existing out there. However, some of the most famous and frequently used ones locally are Omegle, OkCupid, Tinder, Bumble, and Grindr. Due to the positive outcomes and the huge number of users, Facebook also made its own. As the number one social media app, Facebook made Facebook Dating. This allows users to match a random stranger through mutual interests.
Additionally, Facebook also developed an additional corner on their subsequent messaging app, Messenger, which is NearGroup. It allows you to connect to a random stranger. It also gives you the opportunity to reveal each other’s identity after the conversation gets long. This continuous development proves that this online dating norm is a real thing and is something that won’t fade easily.
And of course, success varies per user
Of course, this easy method of looking for a partner to love also has its pros and cons. The number one debate topic about this would be if the relationship would last. To back this up, the researchers of Switzerland’s University of Geneva (UNIGE) did where they studied a sample of 3,235 adults who were in a relationship. From their study, they concluded that couples who met through an app were more motivated to live together than other couples. Additionally, women who met their partners on apps are also interested in family building and are planning to have a child. That means some relationships from dating apps succeeded as well.
However, some did not. Due to the many options available, people tend to keep on scanning more despite already having some. Another factor is that these people started dating without getting to know each other better. Thus leading to personality clashes and breakups. Some couples did not have a better understanding of what each other was looking for sometimes, whether they want a serious relationship or a fling. These are just a few reasons why some relationships from dating apps did not work. Of course, there are still a lot more out there. And these reasons will always vary from one couple to another so never compare.
Sticking with tradition despite the modernization
With the power of technology rising upwards constantly, the power of our usual ways and tradition also fluctuates harshly. Despite the huge change social media, technology, and modernization have brought us, many people still believe that our Filipino culture never dies and still lives within us.
Yes, it’s true that almost everything is done easily and conveniently with the help of our gadgets. However, there’s always this gap inside our hearts that always seem missing, something that we always look for. When we use these modern ways to find love, we tend to look for the butterflies in our stomachs. Well, it may appear to somebody else, and might not with yours, and that’s fine! What’s important to remember is that other’s experiences should never be your basis to try something new. If you want to install the app and start swiping, do it!
It may be confusing and all, but at the end of the day, the one who’ll decide what happens to your (love)life is still you—and it won’t matter if you choose to execute it physically or technologically.
Pat has always been the person who would sit down with a book and finish it in one day. Hence, she fell in love with writing. She is now a proud Iska of Polytechnic University of the Philippines, studying Bachelor of Arts in Journalism. Currently a working student, Pat usually squeezes her time for work, study, and her hobbies, including reading, arts, and watching various stuff. Most especially, she advocates for a cleaner ocean and better marine life.