vp-banner-advertise-with-us
Now Reading
NFR: If this is it, I had a ball

NFR: If this is it, I had a ball

Photo | Lana Del Rey Spotify

The first time I knew it was going to be it came from a very unceremonious moment then. I was packing my things for a five day trip to Sta. Cruz Laguna hence the mobility, the inevitable boarding of the bus, and then the eventual solitude inside. It would’ve been a great blur of memory for there’s nothing more monotonous than the passing of trees and houses and buildings continuously except that I had music on and clutching a piece of donut a colleague gave me. There was a change of scenario and then synchronicity. The surroundings gave way to the music and vice-versa, transcendent of each element and morphed as a conflation of experience. The song was Venice Bitch.

Album of the Year

Photo | Lana Del Rey – Fuck it I love you / The greatest (Official Music Video)

Though it lost, NFR by all its rights deserved Album of the Year enough with only one song. The heart of the record tiptoes around the end of the album. The only song in the latter part that begins with a symphony. A sound in which her entire aesthetic since Born To Die was built: nostalgia. Her ability to fashion sonics is a talent laser-like in its clarity and intention reaching the audience with an intention of making them reflect in an instant.

When the intro fades over, that’s where she comes in: somber, longing, and hopeless. I miss Long Beach and I miss you / I miss dancing with you most of all.

The entire verse is warped in this fuzzy guitar and minimal piano accompaniment. And then slowly builds up to its chorus where she confesses. I’m wa-a-a-asted — growing restless as the world painfully ‘loses’ its greatness. There’s nothing as pensive and melancholic as being burnt out from the reflection of the loss especially when it was once great, at least for her. The culture is lit / And if this it / I had a ball

Almost four years

Photo | Lana Del Rey – Fuck it I love you / The greatest (Official Music Video)

In my pandemic-addled brain, I think NFR should not be listened to in a static position. It was not meant for a contained room but in a moving vehicle or during movement. Anything but static. Its songs hold meaning when accompanied by tactile environment.

You’re in the yard, I light the fire / As the summer fades away / Nothing gold can stay/ she sings in Venice Bitch. It draws power from where life thrives, in community, in open and closed spaces marked by movement.

See Also

There’s a thematic structure in her albums. A few edgy songs here and there all the while maintaining its distinct sonic cohesion. A double-edged sword: it makes each of her albums distinct from one another and creates an appearance that all of her songs are the same. Derived as a statement to America’s dwindling politics, messy subconscious, NFR is Lana’s take on all that is happening.

Throughout the duration of the album up until now, the poignant experiences I’ve had with the album were all from during transit. From buses, trains, jeepneys tricycles, and in cities where each song played, it became their home among many ones I’ve passed. Placated the barrage of curses in my head whenever unexpected situations come up like abrupt train stops.

It’s been almost four years since the release of this album. Exactly placed at the precipice of my teenage years when Hawaii just missed a fireball, LA is in flames it’s getting hot, and oh the livestream’s almost on.

Read more here.

Scroll To Top