It’s Okay Not to Be “That Girl”
It’s already 6:00 a.m.
While most are still hitting snooze, she’s already up—skincare done, smoothie blended, yoga mat rolled out. Then she journals her to-do list before preparing a bowl of oatmeal topped with colorful fruits.
Even after a packed day, she still finds time to meet friends for coffee, run errands, and cook herself a healthy, picture-perfect dinner. Then she resets her alarm—ready to do it all again tomorrow.
Sounds ideal, doesn’t it? For sure, at some point, it becomes every girl’s dream, and many have even tried to recreate it. Meet “That Girl,” the internet’s definition of the so-called ideal woman, who seems to have it all together, living that perfectly curated lifestyle seen across TikTok “For You” pages, Instagram feeds, and YouTube vlogs.
Who is “That Girl?”
“The feminine urge to have it all,” that’s what “That Girl” is all about.
She’s the girl who somehow manages to juggle everything all at once—health, productivity, aesthetics, social life, and personal growth, while making it look effortless.
Typically, she follows structured routines: waking up early, exercising, journaling, meditating, maintaining a clean living space, and eating nutritious meals. She reads regularly, maintains an ideal physical appearance, shows intelligence, enjoys an enviable dating life, and achieves success in many ways.
So, how exactly did she take over social media? It all started with videos showing her entire 24-hour routine—squeezed into a 30 second TikTok video or a five minute YouTube vlog. With perfect lighting and camera angles, it’s like watching an aesthetically pleasing Pinterest board come to life.
But while she represents discipline and aspiration, she also highlights an unrealistic expectation that not everyone can live up to.
Not Everyone Can Be “That Girl”
This trend promotes self-improvement, which is a good thing. But it also opens up a bigger conversation—one about privilege. It’s easy to say, “just wake up earlier, eat healthier, and be more productive,” but not everyone has the same access or resources to live that kind of life.
Imagine having avocado toast with sliced oranges and berries for breakfast or a salad with tahini-lemon dressing for dinner, sounds great, right? Especially when you have a fridge filled with fresh produce from a farmer’s market. But that’s not always an option when groceries alone already stretch the budget. A quiet space for yoga or reading books? Not everyone has that either. Some share a room with siblings, others live in dorms or bed spaces, and many deal with the constant noise of the outside world.
What about having enough time to hit the gym, write in your journal, or grab a cup of coffee at an Instagrammable cafe? After a long day of work, school, and commuting, fitting anything else into their schedule feels impossible when exhaustion has already taken most of their time.
Not everyone can be That Girl; it comes with a hidden cost—one that demands access, time, and privilege. It’s not that others aren’t trying hard enough; it’s just that not everyone is given the same starting line.
It’s Totally Fine If You Can’t Be Her
Being That Girl isn’t all bad. It’s okay to be inspired by the trend, but your participation is entirely optional. If you are that girl and it’s working for you, keep going. But if you’re not, and you feel pressured to keep up, remember: it’s perfectly fine not to be her. Being “This Girl”—your own version of yourself, is more than enough.
At the end of the day, life isn’t an aesthetic. Sometimes it’s messy, unfiltered, and moves at your own pace. While there’s nothing wrong with wanting to improve, don’t measure your life by someone else’s highlight reels.
Maybe you don’t wake up at 6 a.m., maybe you can skip journaling, or maybe your breakfast is just instant coffee and pandesal, and that’s completely okay because you are not That Girl, and you don’t have to force yourself to be one.
Don’t trade your individuality for someone else’s ideal. Your life, your rules—what matters most is that you live it in a way that feels authentic and works for you. Focus on building a life where you don’t feel pressured, where self-care isn’t a rigid checklist, and where skipping a step (whether it’s journaling, meditating, or waking up early) doesn’t make you feel like you’ve failed.
So go ahead, hit that snooze if you need to, stay a little longer in bed when you’re tired, scroll through TikTok until midnight, because life isn’t about living someone else’s routine; it’s about living yours.
